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Starburst

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A tart, rather sticky candy. Starburst are quite easy to find. Main flavors are strawberry, cherry, orange and lemon.

301-Starburst.a.zoom

Individual Starburst Candies.

A reoccurring question found in the starburst commercials being "How do they make starburst so juicy?". The answer is a lot less surprising than you may think. So, how do they make starburst so juicy? Vietnamese children. Working all day and all night just to make starburst as flavorful as they are. Do you think they get breaks, food, or even love? No to all three. In a recent interview, one of these children spoke out about these conditions and just how bad it really is. The Anonymous tip let us know just where to find these starburst camps. Our first plane with the camera equipment was shot down by what we presumed to be child soldiers. We had abandoned the interview. On our way home, our plane was shot down by a spud missile. (God only knows how Vietnam got a hold on one of those). Anyway, we crash landed and most of the people died on-board. I evacuated into the jungle with no knowledge of where i was. After blindly stumbling into the thick brush, I came across a small town, only about 500 people living there at the time. There was a person there who spoke little English, but he helped me get some supplies and try to get to the Airstrip to get me on a plane. He gave me Water bottles, a backpack, a compass, a map of the surrounding area, and some delicious, delicious StarburstTM. He pointed me in the right direction, and I was off. The man had told me that to make it to the airstrip, i had 2 choices, i could go through cannibal country, of go around, but it would take 2 or 3 more days. I was always a fairly lucky man (I won a $5 scratch off once) so decided to test my luck with these "savages". I continued onward for about 5 hours until i saw things. awful things that no sane human should ever, EVER see in their lifetime. Heads on stakes, dismembered bodies with bites taken out of them. Then i saw buildings. small straw huts with a campfire in the middle. I heard rustling behind me. I turned around only to see twenty savages with ragged teeth looking at me. This was when i realized it, i was going to die here. As they tied me up and prepared a fire, a couple of StarburstTM Fell out of my pockets, one of the beasts picked it up, and ate it whole. He then grunted what seemed like commands to the others. They immediately backed away from me and bowed down. Then, what seemed to be the leader of the tribe walked up to me, he didn't speak English, but he did say some words i could understand. He said something about "Helper", whatever that was supposed to mean. I just passed by harm-free. As I continued for what felt like weeks was probably a couple of hours, I saw a temple. I large stone temple, with a large square, stone structure at the top with a large "S" in the middle of it. There was no way around it, the only way to continue was through. After i entered, i stepped onto a tile and the large stone door behind me closed with a slam.

The orange ones taste bad.

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